Raising children is one of the most difficult and most rewarding tasks in the world — and one for which you may feel unprepared.
These 9 parenting hints can help you feel more fulfilled as a parent.
Encourage Your Child’s Self-Esteem
When newborns perceive themselves via their parents’ eyes, they begin to establish a sense of self. Your children pick up on your tone of voice, body language, and facial expressions. More than anything else, your words and actions as a parent influence their developing self-esteem.
Praise for successes, no matter how minor, will help them feel proud; allowing them to do things on their own will make them feel capable and powerful. Belittling comments or unfair comparisons of one child to another, on the other hand, will make children feel worthless.
Avoid using words as weapons or making loaded assertions. Comments such as “What a stupid thing to do!” or “You act more like a baby than your tiny brother!” create just as much damage as physical strikes.
Choose your words wisely and with kindness. Tell your children that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them even if you don’t agree with their conduct.
Observe Children Behaving Well
Have you ever considered how many times you respond adversely to your children in a given day? You could find yourself criticizing more than complimenting. How would you feel about a manager who consistently belittled you, even if it was well-intended?
The most effective technique is to praise them when they execute something right on their own: “You made your bed without being asked – that’s fantastic!” or “I was watching you play with your sister and saw how patient you were.” In the long term, these words will do more to encourage good conduct than frequent scoldings.
Every day, make it a point to discover something to praise. Be generous with your incentives – your love, hugs, and congratulations may work wonders and are frequently sufficient. Soon, you’ll see that you’re “growing” more of the behavior you want to see.
Establish Limits and Stick to Your Discipline
Every home needs discipline. The purpose of discipline is to teach children acceptable behavior and self-control. Kids may test the boundaries you set for them, but they need those boundaries to mature into responsible individuals.
Making home rules teaches children about your expectations and helps them develop self-control. Some ground rules may be: no TV until homework is completed, and no hitting, name-calling, or unpleasant mocking.
You might want to set up a system that includes a single warning followed by repercussions such as “time out” or loss of rights. Failure to follow through on repercussions is a typical error made by parents. You can’t punish them one day and then neglect them the next. Consistency teaches what to anticipate.
Schedule Time for Your Children
In our ever-on world, it is frequently difficult for parents and children to gather for a family dinner, much alone spend meaningful time together. But there is perhaps nothing more appealing to children. Get up 10 minutes earlier to enjoy breakfast with your child, or leave the dishes in the sink and go on a stroll after supper. Children who do not receive the attention they desire from their parents may act out or misbehave in order to be acknowledged.
Many parents find it pleasant to arrange time with their children. Make a “special night” for your family each week and allow your children assist you select how to spend the time. Look for other methods to connect, such as leaving a message or something special in your child’s lunchbox.
Teenagers appear to require less undivided attention from their parents than younger children. Because there are less opportunities for parents and teenagers to interact, parents should make every effort to be present when their teen expresses a want to communicate or join in family activities. Attending concerts, games, and other activities with your adolescent displays care and allows you to learn more about your child and his or her pals.
If you’re a working parent, don’t feel bad about it. Kids will remember the numerous small things you do, such as preparing popcorn, playing cards, and going window shopping.
Be a Good Example
Young children pick up a lot about how to act from their parents. The younger they are, the more they will pick up on your cues. Before you lash out or lose your cool in front of your child, consider this: Is this how you want your child to act when he or she is angry? Be mindful that your children are continuously watching you. According to studies, children who strike generally have an aggressive role model at home.
Model the qualities you want your children to have: respect, friendliness, honesty, kindness, and tolerance. Demonstrate selflessness. Do something for others without expecting anything in return. Thank you and provide praises. Above all, treat your children the way you want others to treat you.
You cannot expect children to do everything just because you, as a parent, “say so”.
They, like adults, seek and deserve answers. Children will begin to question our beliefs and reasons if we do not take the time to explain them. Reasoning with their children allows them to comprehend and learn in a nonjudgmental manner.
Make it clear what you anticipate. If there is a problem, discuss it, share your thoughts, and allow your kid to collaborate with you on a solution. Include the ramifications. Make recommendations and provide options. Be receptive to your child’s ideas as well. Negotiate. Children who are involved in decision-making are more likely to carry them out.
Be adaptable and willing to change your parenting style.
If you frequently feel “let down” by your child’s conduct, it’s possible that you have unreasonable expectations. Parents who think in terms of “should” (for example, “My kid should be potty-trained by now”) may benefit from reading more on the subject or speaking with other parents or child development professionals.
Because children’s settings influence their conduct, you may be able to modify that behavior by changing something small in their environment. If you find yourself saying “no” to your 2-year-old all the time, look for methods to change your environment so that fewer items are off-limits. This will make things easier for both of you.
Your parenting approach will have to evolve as your child grows. What works for your child now may not work as well in a year or two.
Teens look to their friends for role models rather than their parents. However, continue to give advice, encouragement, and appropriate discipline while your adolescent gains independence. And take advantage of every opportunity to connect!
Express Your Unconditional Love
You are accountable as a parent for correcting and guiding your children. However, how you convey remedial feedback makes a huge impact in how a youngster perceives it.
When confronting your kid, avoid accusing, condemning, or finding fault, since this can damage self-esteem and lead to resentment. Instead, even when scolding your children, attempt to nurture and encourage them. Make it clear to them that, while you want and expect better the next time, your love is always present.
As a parent, be aware of your own needs and limitations.
Face it: you are a flawed parent. As a family leader, you have both strengths and shortcomings. Recognize your strengths: “I am kind and dedicated.” Make a commitment to improving your deficiencies – “I need to be more consistent with discipline.” Try to set reasonable goals for yourself, your partner, and your children. You don’t have to know all the answers; be kind with yourself.
And make parenting a manageable task. Rather of attempting to cover everything at once, concentrate on the areas that require the most attention. When you’re exhausted, admit it. Take some time away from parenting to do activities that make you joyful.
You are not selfish if you prioritize your needs. It just indicates you are concerned about your personal well-being, which is an important trait to instill in your children.
What are some other things we may have missed here that can help parents be effective in parenting? Comment below, or get in touch with us.